Sex Problems & Solution

Author: Ahmed Bright Aluaye

Age: 24 years

Country: Nigeria

 

How Porn Affect The Human Brain (Porn Viewing Leads to Addiction / Maturbation)

Nearly all men who view pornography use it as the stimulus for masturbation. As a result they frequently suffer feelings of guilt, shame, regret and humiliation. Many men become addicted to pornography and lose their freedom. They feel trapped, out of control, and in despair.

They literally become slaves to their own lust. Pornography places men on an emotional roller coaster. One minute they're happy, the next they're sad; calm, then angry; kind, then cold. These moods change without warning, causing stress and pain for wives, children, friends and associates.

Feelings of estrangement ensue, further isolating and alienating them from their loved ones, which often drive men even deeper into the self-medicating escape of pornography. Men isolated on the slippery slope of pornography typically fail in their families and marriages, and in their relations with people in general. They are less effective, less reliable, less creative, and more prone to meanness and fits of anger.

In essence, pornography turns men into zombie-like characters who are but a shadow of their true selves and potential. They waste their time, talents and resources, caught up in their own dark little world of pornography viewing. In the advanced stages, pornography addiction can lead a man to commit rape, incest, violence, exhibitionism, other sex-related crimes and even suicide.

Millions of men have lost their families, their careers, their reputations, their good names, and their freedom just to satisfy their addiction. Pornography can take an immensely good, talented, enthusiastic man and turn him into one of the walking dead. Porn is a purely selfish hobby-it gives nothing to anyone but the viewer and the porn producer. In that way it is not at all like other hobbies, such as painting, writing, playing a musical instrument, woodworking or gardening, which give something of value to others and make the hobbyist a more well-rounded person.

How Does Pornography Viewing Cause Brain Damage? I want to share with you a body of scientific facts that supports Dr. Ron Miller's diagnosis of Laurie Hall's husband, when he said, "You've destroyed your mind by fantasizing. You've dug a deep channel going in one direction.

The rest of your mind is atrophied!" Dr. Gary Lynch, a neuro-scientist at the University of California at Irvine, in discussing how the human brain processes information received from the outside world, said: "What we are saying here is that an event which lasts half a second, within five to ten minutes has produced a structural change that is in some ways as profound as the structural changes one sees in [brain] damage." Further commenting on how a word or image can immediately alter the brain structure, Dr. Lynch says, " . . . in a matter of seconds, taking an incredibly modest signal, a word . . . which is in your head as an electrical signal for no more than a few seconds, can . . . leave a trace that will last for years." In the book The Brain and Nervous System, it states: . . . Our thoughts, feelings and memories exist as particular patterns of nerve messages, passing repeatedly along certain pathways in the brain. Each message would burn a specific pathway among the billions of axons and dendrites. In my research of numerous scientific papers, experiments and studies, one thing stands out: Stored away in the cells of your brain and body are all the things you have ever seen, heard, felt, tasted or smelled.

That's why Dr. Miller was able to tell Jack after 20 years of porn, "You've destroyed your mind by fantasizing. You've dug a deep channel going in one direction." Jack had literally developed a one-track mind. After reading about Jack, there are some who will say, "That's a rather extreme example. I'm sure that there are men who look at pornography and don't end up like Jack." True enough, but I think most people would be shocked at just how many Jacks are out there whose brains and lives have been devastated by long-term porn addiction. And I can guarantee you, with the porn floodgates wide open on the Internet, the number of "Jacks" in the world is soaring.

Top 5 difference between male and female attitudes to sex

 

"You may think you're perfectly in synch with your man, but chances are he's in a world of his own"

 

 It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that men and women approach sex from different corners. But don't you just wish you could read his mind from time to time and discover what he's really thinking about doing the dirty?

We've done some digging and come up with a list of the top five ways that men and women differ when it comes to sex.

Let us know what you think...

1. Emotional Connection

Most women need some kind of emotional connection to have sex. This could be friendship, passion, love or lust, but there has to be something there to be something there to make us what to get down to it. Sociologists put this down to feelings of security - we are in the more vulnerable position and feel the need for safety.

Men on the other hand actually develop their emotional connection from having sex. The vast majority of blokes don't need to feel an emotional pull to someone in order to have sex with them - all of the feelings of love, safety and passion come after.

Scientists think this can be explained by natural 'primal urges', which subconsciously tell men to dominate the female before protecting her (both physically and emotionally). Yikes!

2. You are always on my mind

The average woman thinks about sex ten times a day (but we think about food 15 times per day). On a day-to-day basis you head is probably more focused on office deadlines, dinner plans and shopping lists than on sex. This is because most women need more than just a visual image to be turned on. Thinking about a naked man just doesn't do it for us...unless you're having a particularly dirty day dream.

The average male thinks about sex 19 times a day - so not quite every three seconds as the rumours suggest! This is because men are biologically destined to 'see' sex in their daily lives. Their visual senses are much stronger, which means they can find sexual arousal just by looking at a beautiful woman, smelling perfume, feeling long hair on their arm etc.

3. Get expressive

Typically, women need to talk before and after sex as a way of encouraging feelings of love, appreciation and happiness. When a guy demonstrates affection or shows-off his romantic side don't be surprised if you start feeling turned-on. It's your subconscious telling you that you can give yourself to this man safely.

Men are far less complicated when it comes to boosting their libidos. Men have fluctuations in hormone levels, which means they are more ready for sex in the morning than in the afternoon. Women don't have the same peaks in their hormones meaning we can get to it whenever we feel the urge. Plus, he won't need to talk to validate his feelings before and after sex...just having sex is all the information he needs.

4. Numbers matter

Because sex is subconsciously a symbol of power and dominance for men the amount of women they have slept with DOES matter. It's like a gold star for their egos! Women don't have this same urge to go forth and populate the earth, so we're much more content with a smaller number of trustworthy sexual partners who offer us something in return - traditionally - a home, security, strength and protection from predators. In 2012, we want a man who remembers to pick his socks up off the floor.

5. Success is key

Men work in the moment - if they get awkward, mess-up or..heaven forbid, don't get an erection when required, they will probably feel like the world is over. Women tend to see sex as an overall experience. Although each individual encounter matters, it's the whole picture (the passion, lust, excitement) that defines whether the sex is good or not.

Premarital sexuality and social effects

Sexuality is an instinct imprinted into the genes of each living creature. Attraction to the opposite sex has been the key factor behind reproduction and survival of each species. Most of the species are born with only seasonal sexual necessities. They mate and reproduce only at limited times a year.
Human beings, on the other hand, have active sexual instincts throughout his/her life; right from the very day he/she discovers his/her sexuality in pre-adulthood. This instinct has found overpowering the cultural advancement we have gained over the past.
Sexuality is only sexuality for all other animals, but human beings have restricted forms of sexuality like pre-marital sexuality and extra-marital sexuality. The main reason behind introducing this restriction is that unlike all other animals we live in a civilized society with strict norms of morality and cultural obligations. The society always long for mature relationships and mutual respect between each member of this society. The main goal behind bringing in the sexual restrictions is that each member of this society should be treated with dignity and not as instruments of fulfilling lust.

What is premarital sexuality?

Though a human being gains the physical maturity of procreation at the beginning of puberty, he/she is considered eligible for mating and reproduction much later may be after 18 years of age or 20. And also the society insists that a sexual practice outside a marriage is improper and illegal at times.
Premarital sexuality is any sexual activity with an opposite sex partner or with a same sex partner before he/she has started a married life. The term is usually used to refer the intercourse before the legal age of a marriage. Adults who presumably marry eventually also fall under this definition.

Why premarital sex is forbidden?

Modern societies don't appreciate premarital lovemaking for various reasons. Lovemaking is no more considered an outflow of the natural sexual instincts among human beings. We see it as a necessary obligation to share the romance between married couples and also as a medium to fulfill the social responsibility of giving birth to the next generation.
Sexuality is not an instrument of enjoying lustful pleasure for human beings, at least. In premarital sex, many a times, immature human beings explore the sexuality, jut out of curiosity, and might be are unaware of the consequences. Society has forbid premarital sex from the very outlook that adolescence is the time to form oneself as mature and responsible human being and not at all a time to procreate.

After effects of premarital sex

Sex in itself, is not wrong at any age; but premarital sex may harm the mental development of adults in several forms. Premarital sexual experiences, many a times, leads to the misconception that sex is to be enjoyed at whatever ways possible. Forced premarital lovemaking will lead to mental depression and dilemma. Another danger is possible exchange of diseases; as premarital partners may not be aware of diseases that spread through intercourses. Getting pregnant through premarital sex is another disaster. Emotional imbalances and guilt feeling could be the result of most premarital sexual affairs.

How to prevent premarital sex

Premarital sex is not approved by any modern society, yet, stories of adolescent fathers and mothers come out largely, especially from the highly civilized European nations. Modern lifestyle has opened multiple opportunities for boys and girls to interact closely and deeply in public and private. They have ample chances to experiment the sexuality which they witness through internet and Televisions.
Law can only threaten people, can never make them to not do something. The most effective way of defending premarital lovemaking is spreading awareness of healthy sexuality among children. Awareness of healthy sexuality is not at all the knowledge of safe sexuality. Train them to mingle with opposite sex in a mature way. Inspire them with mutual respect between man and woman. From the very childhood itself a baby should learn to accept people as men and women, the equal partners of life on earth; not as objects to fulfill lusty wishes and ambitions.